I Love a Good List

A good list keeps me sane. It keeps me focused. It keeps me on track. Just the act of making the list makes me happy.

Have I mentioned that we're taking THREE vacations with THREE kids under THREE years old?! I haven't? Oh. That's probably because I was in denial until yesterday.

Now that I'm actually acknowledging that these trips are going to happen, I'm choosing not to focus on the insanity ahead of us, but instead on the scores of lists that will need to be made to get us through these trips in one piece.

Here are the categories I have so far:

Clothing

Baby gear

Toddler gear

Toiletries

Car snacks

Car activities

Airplane friendly activities

To do/prep before leaving

To make/buy before leaving

Groceries to bring/meal plans

Electronics

Water gear

The first trip is a family trip to Hot Springs, AR, where we'll stay in a house and need to cook our own meals. The second is a trip to family camp in the Ozark's with nine other families from our church - meals are taken care of, but we're without the luxuries of having a house to ourselves. The third trip I'm taking sans-hubby, and it's on an airplane! Three kids alone, getting through an airport, security and keeping occupied for a 2.5 hour flight while holding an 11 mo old on my lap. Heaven help me. Thankfully, we're flying to my sister's house and once we're there, it'll be just like home - toys, baby gear, minivan - awesome.

I'm looking for items to add to my 'Car Activities' list. Suggestions are greatly appreciated! Keep in mind, the boys are not quite three, so games like the license plate game aren't going to work.

Send me some ideas... I'm starting my lists!!

Potty Training: One at a Time is Still HARD!

My boys are just shy of 2 1/2 years old. A few weeks ago, they both started asking to 'go peepee, get gummi?' I went with it, not really thinking that it would go anywhere. They both peed several times, but since then E has decided that he's terrified of sitting on the potty. In fact, he starts to freak out when I'm changing him from his pj's to his clothes saying 'no mom, don't take diaper!' So... he's not ready, clearly.

O has maintained his interest, so I'm going with it. He hasn't worn a diaper since Monday, but everyday seems a little bit different and a little more difficult. At first he was really willing to pee on the potty, but it seems to be a fine line between reminding him to stay dry too often and not often enough. He wants to wear 'skivvies' instead of his diaper, but had four accidents yesterday and held his bladder for 3.5 hours this morning before finally peeing. I'm not sure if he's just learning to hold it better or being really stubborn (or both!)

The boys have always done everything within days of each other - but this is one milestone I'm glad that I can focus on one at a time. Add in a 6 month old and another toddler to care for and it's all I can do to get to the end of the day in one piece! This. is. stressful!!

How do you know when a kid is officially 'potty trained'? Is it enough not to have accidents during the day or do they have to initiate using the potty themselves rather than being reminded? Any pointers to share!?

Two Reasons to Start Posting Again...

Owen and Eli.

They turned two less than two months ago and we are in the depths of power struggles, tantrums and control issues. The biggest issue we've been dealing with lately occurs every night at dinnertime. They hate their highchairs/being strapped down but they don't want to sit in a seat like a big boy. They have suddenly become uber-picky eaters too. They will literally put both hands over their mouths to block the food while they shake their heads back and forth in refusal. The infuriating thing is that they have to be hungry!

We're trying to figure out how to handle dinnertime without turning it into a power struggle. If they won't eat, do we just take the food away and make them go to bed hungry? Should they go straight to bed or be allowed to play? Should we give them their dinner at breakfast until they finally eat it? I don't want to be super stubborn about this, but I will not make toddler-popular dinners for them just because they won't eat what we're having. I want us to enjoy eating dinner together and right now, it is not an enjoyable time.

Please tell me that we're not the only ones with picky eaters. What do you do? What strategies have you tried that have worked or failed? What's the hardest you've ever come down on your kids over a power struggle issue? I know that trying to force them to do anything makes them 100% less likely to do it - so what are my options? Comment Comment Comment!!

Getting the Hang of This

I'm a newbie at this whole couponing thing, but my purchases tonight at Kroger sealed the deal for me to keep plugging along. I got:

• a gallon of milk


• 2 Gillette body washes


• 2 family size packages of pudding


• a container of Pampers wipes


• Dawn dish soap


• All laundry detergent


• Resolve Spray n Wash refill

... and only paid $10.65!!

I've been using SouthernSavers.com for help on the deals and coupons of the week at two of the local grocery stores and have really been seeing a big difference in the bottom line. My biggest hangup with coupons has always been that I felt that using coupons would tempt me to buy things that I wouldn't normally purchase, but that hasn't been the case so far. The trick is to use the coupons with sale items, not on full price (and over priced) items. I'd love to hear any success stories you have with couponing. What websites do you use for help? What strategies have you found work the best? Are you a CVSer? (I haven't been brave enough to try this one yet!) Share your tips!

Who Needs a Clock?!

I'm hoping that some of you with kids older than 18 months will respond to this post because I'm wondering if I'm alone in this crazy twist of a schedule.

Even since the boys turned 18 months, their sleep schedule has totally shifted. They used to go to bed between 7-7:15pm, wake up between 7:30-8am and nap from 1-2:30. Now, they aren't even remotely tired until 7:30-8pm, but they are waking at 6:45am on the nose and napping from 1-3:30 or 4pm (sometimes even later!). I really can't complain about waking up 45 minutes early if they are going to give me an extra 1-1.5 hours of free time in the afternoon, but they do seem to be a little crankier in the mornings than they ever were before. They are up the second the sun rises! Will they go back to sleeping later once daylight savings time hits this weekend?

Two questions: 1) How are you handling Daylight Savings Time? 2) Did your kids go through a sleep shift at any point and what was it?

Favorite Things Friday - Toddler Gear Edition

Toddlers are clumsy, messy little people! Here are a few items my 'favorites' in the category of Toddler Gear. What have been some of your favorite Toddler Gear items?

Dex Baby Dura-Bibs

When I first saw these bibs, the crazy loud patterns and size weren't #1 on my list. I thought we could get by on the cutesy velcro bibs from Babies R Us, and we could until the boys started pulling them off. The velco bibs were weak and the boys still aren't able to pull these bibs off. They are large enough to cover their whole belly and have a deep pocket to catch anything that they drop. I've only been able to find them in Meijer in Detroit, but I'm sure they are available in other places.

Especially for Baby Spout Cover

When the boys first started standing, all they wanted to do was stand up in the bathtub. The problem was that they spent more time falling than they did standing. They still aren't able to pull it off the spout and it's inflatable, so they don't get hurt if they fall into it. For $3.29 at Babies R Us, it's worth every penny.

Blender Baby Food

I made almost all of the boys' baby food when they were first starting on solids and this book was my bible for recipes. The recipes were super simple to follow and the book was divided into chapters for 6, 7, 8, and 9-12 months old. As the baby grows, the recipes become more diverse and chunky, which allows for an easier transition to table food. If you're at all interested in making your own food, I highly recommend this book. I took it out from the library and wrote down recipes for the month, then took it out again when the boys were ready for different foods.

Munchkin Snack Cups

There are a few things that I really love about these cups: you can attach a paci clip to the handle so the cup doesn't fall on the floor, the lids are almost impossible for kids to pull off, and even if shaken, the snack doesn't fall out. They are diswasher safe and easy for kids to pull their hands out of. The only problem is that the boys aren't quite coordinated enough to pull out one piece at a time, but it at least takes them longer to eat a snack than it would to just put it on their tray. Great for the car or on the go!

Those are a few of my favorite things... how about you?

Discipline Dots

If you've ever watched Jon & Kate Plus 8 (when it was on... so sad), you know that their kids know exactly where to go for Time Out. They have a little rug near the front door that the kids sit on until they are told that they can come out. There is no ambiguity in where they should be, or whether or not they can wander around. Their designated space is the size of a welcome mat and the kids respected the boundaries of the rug.

My friend Lisa (visit her at www.etsy.com/shop/navymango) has come up with an awesome idea called the Discipline Dot (or Naughty Spot!) These adorable circles are made of two different colors of fleece and are easy to take on the go. You can have one on each floor or keep one in the diaper bag to use at Grandma's house or on play dates. It stops you from having to search for an appropriate place to put your child when you want to keep him or her from the rest of the group. Sometimes there aren't any available corners. Problem solved! You can train your child to respect the boundaries of the Discipline Dot whether you're home or away. And at only $6.99 per dot (plus shipping), they are an amazing item to own.

This makes me wonder... if your kids are of 'disciplining age,' what do you do for time outs? How long do you keep them there? What conversations do you have afterwards? What do you use time outs for (versus other punishments or just giving a warning)?

Parenting Strategery

If you haven't heard by now, we're joining the ranks of the 'Outnumbered Parents Club.' That's right, #3 is on the way, due mid August!

Though we already have two kids, I am still thinking of this new baby the same way that most think about #2 - that is, we will finally have kids in separate stages of life, requiring different things, sleeping at different times, eating different things and at different times and demanding everything we have to give.

Don't get me wrong, we're so excited for a new baby, but with that comes a slight fear of the newness of a newborn plus the energy of toddlers mixed with the recovery of birth and the 24 hour-ness of nursing. Oh boy!

So let's band together now and start brainstorming. I know that many of you readers have already passed this test of parenthood and have successfully survived the introduction of new babies into your family, but I also know that some of you are in the midst of that craziness right now and others, like me, are about to embark on the insanity within the next several months.

What has gotten you through? How have you survived? How have you made life easier on yourself? What conveniences have you used in your house? What have you ignored doing? What shortcuts have you taken?

Please share what worked, and whether or not it was worth the money (if applicable). If you're like me and haven't yet begun this phase of parenthood, what ideas do you have that you are planning on using?

Let's get this support system going! Please comment to help us ALL out either now or in the (near!) future : )

From Thanksgiving to Tantrums...

Calling all moms with kids old enough to have thrown tantrums! I need your help!

The boys are getting to be possessive, opinionated, emotional kids. If one takes a toy or book from the other or starts standing too close, if they can't get a puzzle piece to fit in the correct spot, or if I take something (like the phone) off of them, a full out screeching tantrum usually begins. Eli is especially bad, throwing himself into a back bend and practically hitting his head off the floor or wall. They are the happiest kids if you let them do what they want, but when that includes trying to open the cabinets under the sink or playing in the toilet, obviously they have to be stopped.

So what do you do?! I have been laying Eli down on the floor (so he doesn't hurt himself) and just walking away. The crying doesn't last long, but their reaction when things don't go their way is so over the top that it drives me nuts!

I have a feeling that this is just a fact of life, but does anyone have any tips that have worked to ease the pain of tantrums? Even things that have worked in specific circumstances (like when a puzzle piece won't fit) would be helpful!

Guest Post: Communication is Key

Just a few days ago, my husband and I celebrated our 12 year anniversary. We went to a cozy little Inn in Connecticut and drank wine and reminisced about our years together. We have found that over the years the ability to communicate openly with a great vulnerability is what has kept our marriage strong. (As an aside I must mention that our faith in Christ is the strongest clue and the most important part, but in terms of positive techniques, communication wins!) Communication covers a wide range of topics, but since we are talking about the “spark” I will focus on the more intimate sides of communication. Every marriage has its times of strength and times of hardship. I remember back to when our son was born. With this being our first child, everything was new. Our lack of sleep and constant questions kept things quite interesting at our house. I do remember when those six weeks ended and the doctor gave us the okay to have sex. It was like we were in a period of relearning. My body was no longer my own but now being shared by a little milk drinking cutie. I could remember during that season how my husband and I talked and talked about what was working and what was not. I think the honesty in communication during this season is vital. Be honest that you are super tired and not that into love making. Even in that season we both made the conscious decision that we would stick with it… not give up… not let a month pass. It was our time to connect, to share our love together and to gain strength from one another. We have discovered that over the past 12 years that sex isn’t a chore, something that you “have to do”. It is a gift. It is the one thing that draws couples together that makes your marriage grow. Have you ever experienced the weeks when it gets put on the back burner? The constant nagging back and forth over silly things, like who didn’t buy new milk or why the trash can is still sitting in the driveway! We have also tried to jazz things up a bit in terms of where we are intimate. Not just at the same time in the evening or in the same room. It really does help to make it fun. To keep it fun. It was fun for most of us, those years before our sweet ones came along. It can still be that way. The big “but” here is that without communication, it won’t be. As wives, we must express to our husbands what we are thinking and how we are feeling. If I have learned anything it is that they just don’t get it intuitively. They are men and we are women. We are different. That is the truth. So if you want to be hugged and he has forgotten, then ASK him. If you want a date night and it hasn’t happened in awhile, just ASK him. Work may be keeping him busy and it just hasn’t been the first thing on his radar. Please don’t mistake this for him not wanting to do these things with you or for you! So that is it in a nut shell for this month’s bit of advice. Keep the communication lines open, have fun together and remember who you married, who you chose!! He’s the guy sleeping beside you each night!!! Denise currently resides in Danbury, CT with Justin, her husband of 12 years, and their 5 ½ year old son, Charlie. Denise works part time at her local church as the nursery coordinator—coordinating classes for children, infants to two years of age. In her spare time, she is perusing her passion of acting in NYC. Her goal is to do commercials and television sitcoms!

I am a MOPE and I Need Some Help!

I don't mean MOPE as a characteristic of my attitude, I mean a Mother of Picky Eaters. I came across this chart for help with vitamins and vegetables, but there are still problem areas. Breakfast and lunch are typically no problem. The boys will eat anything from cereal to waffles, bagels to oatmeal and any fruit you put in front of them (except cantaloupe for some reason). For lunch, they love peanut butter & jelly, ham and cheese, turkey and cheese, fruits and pastas. The problem is dinner! I can't get them to eat white meat (chicken, pork), a variety of vegetables, rice or potatoes. If you're in the same boat with vegetables, maybe this will help.

Vitamin A
If they won't eat CARROTS, give them baked sweet potato fries, cantaloupe or dried apricots

Vitamin C
If they won't eat BROCCOLI, give them tomato sauce, red or green peppers or strawberries

Potassium
If they won't eat SPINACH, give them baked white potatoes, bananas or steamed edamame

Folate
If they won't eat LETTUCE, give them cooked green peas, orange juice or asparagus

I have to admit that I'm torn with this list. I don't want to be a short order cook for my kids and I want them to have to try different things instead of just giving them what I know they like. Can a child be too young to force them to eat what is on their plate?!

What do you think about this? Are your kids picky eaters? What have you done about it? Do you have any suggestions for my meat-less eaters? Are you a MOPE too?